#The Need for Meaningful Connections

INSPIRATIONAL QUOTE

FULL TRANSCRIPT

Hello and welcome to the Malkan Show podcast I am Meghna Malkan. Thanks so much for joining me today on this episode of the podcast.

I know your time is valuable and I'm really happy that you're listening to me today I have begun with this podcast because after being coached by the world's best I wanted to share with you guys.

What's success habit, success tools and success ques this - excuse me get on to higher levels of performance at work a great relationship with my spouse and kids so guys let's dive into the next episode.

Let's talk about Connections today as human beings. Our nature is such that we all want to feel connected to those around us. That's the basic human need. the challenge in our modern society.

Is that of course thanks to social media? We are more connected to more people than ever before but all those connections are more superficial than ever do you feel so because in this not-too-distant past our friendships were limited to people in our immediate neighborhoods. So like you know who the real friends that we had.

There was a shock process of elimination. We only had a handful of people to consider as friends. But today we have hundreds or even to some extent even thousands of so-called inverted commas friends online. But how many of them are real and how many actually count how many of them matters how many do we really trust?

Just how many could we call in Times of Crisis or Triumph? Your friendships have as much bearing on your happiness and life as does the kind of work you do or the amount of money you make and that's the fact anyone who tells you otherwise is lying. That's why it's time you finally figured out the Friendship factor in your life.

And that's what we're going to be talking about today. If friendships have a big effect on your happiness on your will be and overall your joy in life. Then the effect of your intimate relationships is on supernovas. No other area influences your life satisfaction as much as your relationship with your spouse or significant other does.

When you're in love and it's working, it's wow, you feel you feel on top of the world. You're giddy. You really make out like teenagers 10 send each other, you know, the stupid cute love text messages, you feel a deep emotional and spiritual connection with that one person.

You're supposed to be within the moment and Ever After but the thing is nothing n literally mean nothing provides a greater.

Satisfaction and joy in life than a little love life. That's true. Psychologists have found that the happiest 10% of people on earth have one thing in common.

They all have Rich fulfilling socialized and intimate relationships. So this drive the innate human right for connecting with people and this includes both casual as well as Intimates is so strong that we sometimes end up devoting time to people for much longer than they deserve, you know, exactly what I mean when I say this, I mean think about it you've all been in horrible relationships and stay too long too.

Too Long means it's like you're aware that you should have stayed so long in the first case and of course and that doesn't include the case.

You ended up marrying your high school sweetheart who actually turned out to be mostly clear into adulthood. You have strange negative or ambition-sucking friends.

You should have dumped years ago, but you do not, so what could possibly spark this strange Behavior? You could blame him and blame it on God or Evolution, but eventually, both of these lead to one come culprit and which is your brain brains whether divinely inspired or genetically mutated whatever it is have become tuning forks for so.

Connection and attachment our desire to bond with people and to belong to someone out ways almost every other desire often. Even our desire for survival, which is our most basic human desire. Sometimes people are willing to give up their lives because they don't belong to someone or they don't have a partner in their lives.

I've had numerous coaching sessions with people where just because it's basic dry for connection was missing they couldn't belong to someone they literally went to the extent of feeling like giving up their lives or together relationship connections.

I like fingers on a dispenser of our brain's reward areas. It's like that way so a good connection hits even momentarily and Bam we get this green candy.

We get dopamine and oxytocin. We feel euphoric we feel connected. It and we cling on to that person. So there's no doubt that the drive for connection has kept us alive as a species.

We are less susceptible to attack and death when we hunt and stay together as a basic human instinct. We learn faster in social groups advancing our abilities to outsmart our predators and you know, successfully mastering our environment, and in these times that we're living in guys a modern times, we would have no culture no workplace, and no Facebook.

Group, if we didn't have if he weren't so driven to share and leverage our connections our smarts the problem is that as much as they want to connect with others. We also want to exert our own bills on the world and our relationships. That's where the conflict comes into play this Euphoria.

They're talking about this Euphoria of connecting with others often over a period of time spirals into the bit.

This of conflict and naturally we all have our you know, what we call so-called individual values and viewpoints that we feel are important and that we feel that matter.

So when someone questions what we find important on how we seized see things though, we get defensive the more defensively feel the more we want to exert our independent voices or thoughts or our feelings. Things our standards and this could lead either to understanding or to conflict and more than anything else most often. It feeds into conflict.

And if all this is true, then perhaps have a real challenge in improving our relationships across the board would be the ideal thing would be to learn to understand and communicate our own needs for Independence at the same time having interdependent relationships.

Maybe we should hold on to how to honor each other's individuality as we get closer to each other. What is your spouse need? What are her or his demands for individuality?

Have you thought about that after almost all the things that get us into trouble in our relationships all of those, you know, criticism beat competition? We'd harsh disagreements or we defensiveness all of these stems from a lack of understanding not able to accept Or not able to validate each other's uniqueness and individuality you take any relationship when you go to the Crux of why the two people are getting separate all of your finds one or more of these reasons.

It's all easier said than done. Of course, you'd say but the struggle to form better deeper and you can see more empowering connections and relationships are totally worth it guys. You could do everything suggested by all the learner people around.

Globe but if you feel to forge meaningful Connections in life, then at the end of it all is all that you're going to ask yourself is what's it all for because feeling happy and energized is one thing but being able to share that energy and enthusiasm with others, especially those whom you deeply care about and adore. That's the real Hallmark of a fully joyful life because true lifelong happiness comes from connecting with and

Next thing with and loving others, so it's best that we figure out how to do that as soon as possible, and as best as we can there's more on this coming up in later episodes.

I wish you all the best. It's Meghna again. I hope you enjoyed your episode of the malkan show podcast please share with three friends right now.

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I want you to know that I'm very thankful to have you here into the Malkan show community and I wish to join and abundance in all You do.

Feb 12, 2021   #The Malkan Show